Springer-ing forward

Jer-ry!  Jer-ry!  Jer-ry!  For those of you who may not know, I got a new job!  Ow-ow!  I am the newest production assistant at The Jerry Springer Show.  

This is not your ordinary PA job.  In my last two weeks, I have not had a day that didn't involve communication with a prostitute, baby-daddy, or drug-addict.  In most cases, I conversed, at length, with all three.  Special moments include taking strippers to lunch, bribing people with cigarettes and browsing craigslist's "erotic" section for leads.  Hardly anything seems shocking after watching a few hefty women earn their "Jerry beads".  

I'm exhausted and out of words for today, but stay tuned for my final thought.